The Other Side Of The Fence
by nairiefairie
Summary: Harry finds himself lost in a story of the other side,in a truly Black tale. Narcissa tells Harry the story of her cousin Regulus and her life on the other side of the fence. R&R Complete.
1. Chapter 1

Intro

Harry didn't know what drove him to Malfoy manor. There was his thirst to understand what happened before his time. He wanted, he needed to know how the world got to a point that they would turn on their own family. He had found out about his parents. Then his werewolf friend Remus Lupin, followed by his Godfather Sirius Black.

Theses people he knew well, the one person in the twisted tale of Voldemort, he still wanted to know, was Sirius's little brother Regulus.

Harry had gone to Andromeda Tonks, his cousin in hope of an answer. Andromeda couldn't help him, Regulus was still so young when she was thrown out of the Noble House of Black. She however pointed Harry in the direction of her younger sister, no other then Narcissa Malfoy. Which is why he sat awkwardly sipping tea from fine china.

He had asked to know about Regulus, sending Narcissa into deep thought. As she pulled herself back to the real world, she looked into his eyes, a slight question written across her lips. She didn't ask him, she didn't question it.

She spoke softly with a grace, he could never possess.

"I can't tell you much I am afraid because no one truly knows another person. I however will tell you my story with interlinked with my cousin. People often speak of dear Sirius but I tell you now, Regulus was the better brother, always." She smiled sadly.

"People often talked about him as the boy who got in to deep, that he couldn't handle it. He was spoken of, as the coward.

But those few that knew the truth, he was no coward. He was the unsung hero, he did what others could never dream of. He made the ultimate sacrifice, himself.

This is the tale of R.A.B."

She sighed. "From my point of view, at least. However, there are some secrets that will go to the grave with me, Mr Potter. Regulus trusted me with his life, as I did with him. I will tell you what I can, and I promise not to lie but some things must remain unsaid." Harry nodded. She knew everything, he was sure now that he was in the right place.

" So this is how the story goes….."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: You know if I owned Harry Potter, he wouldn't of been the star, it would have been someone cooler, like McGonagall….

One could say many things about the Black family. Some would claim they were the picture of the magical community, some would say they were as dark as their name. but when it came down to it, a name was just a name, it was what you choose to make with it, that made the difference.

The Black boys had started out as all children do, young and innocent. He had his parents, his friends, to influence him. He had his brother, Sirius, who had a strong will, and a defiant strike that could make his mother curse him to the moon. Sirius was in some ways always the Blacker of sons, the heir to the fortune.

However the same could never be said for young Regulus. He was always second best, he was never the loved one, never the important one. He was just the painful younger brother.

I could go into the details that lead to the events of his fated childhood but really they are so obvious now you look at the whole picture, there is really no need.

Regulus was just the opposite of Sirius but at the same time, the branch never falls far from the tree.

It was Regulus's first day of Hogwarts. Sirius had attempted to scare him silly all summer but Regulus was bright enough not to take everything Sirius said seriously.

His mother had been fuming since Sirius was named a Griffindor. She was horrified that her, pure, darling, prince of a son had become a Griffindor. Regulus hadn't been surprised really. His big brother loved to torment and annoy his mother, so naturally he was going to whined up somewhere other then Slytherin. And there was also the small fact Sirius and James Potter were glue together at the hip. The Potter's had been in the house of the lion as long as the Black had been partnered with the serpent. It was in their blood but Sirius was never one for the rules. He had broken a seven generation tradition by becoming a Griffindor. Regulus knew how the hat could pick his brother for that house.

Sirius was still Black in so many ways, but he was defiant until the end. He would never back down from a fight, he looked out for his own. Yes his brother at times could be considered to be brave. It was a terrifying thought to Regulus, being brave. No he wasn't going to be like his big brother, he knew as the hat lowered down on to his head, he would stick with tradition, the house of the snake. After all he would never call himself brave, cunning was more his style. He was a deceiving, lying cheat, or at least that's what Sirius said. Regulus saw it as a perfectly planned strategy, to make a bit of money and now Sirius wouldn't play chess with him anymore.

He filed down the train, other students shoving their way through to meet their friends. Sirius was with James, Peter and Remus. He rolled his eyes as Sirius indicated for him to keep moving down the train. Sirius didn't want to put up with his little brother, Regulus couldn't blame him really, they had been stuck with each other all summer. But still it meant he was all alone. He hated that, the sinking feeling creeping through his body. He hated being by himself and yet, he was as shy as they came. He was a pure blood, but his magical linage wasn't something he felt he needed to boast about. He was a particular loud person, no, he was a tad dull and boring compared to his big brother. He wondered around the train until he found a place to sit by himself. He wasn't in the mood to make nice with all the other children he knew, that could wait until later.

I like to think, as he sat staring out at the passing scenery, he wondered what sort of life he would lead. What kind of future would Hogwarts bring him. He wondered if he could ever live up to him mothers expectations. He wondered if Sirius would ever be proud of his little brother.

It didn't take me long to hunt down my baby cousin. We sat in silence, I would never leave Regulus alone, like Sirius. He was my favourite cousin, he was the brother I never had.

Sirius had my sister Andy and Bellatrix had herself and that man of hers.

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Harry couldn't but notice the appalled look Narcissa wore. He thought the Malfoy's liked the Lestrange, but as he was beginning to learn in life, thing weren't always as they seemed.

Narcissa sighed gazing at Harry Potter for a long moment.

"But none of that is what you really want to hear is it? You don't want to know about Regulus's skills as a seeker or his abilities in charms and potions."

"No, not really." Harry admitted grimly.

"You want to know how he ended up as a death eater."

Harry nodded.

"I thought as much." She looked at him sadly. She sighed, twirling her spoon in her tea.

"As hard as it is to admit, it was entirely my fault."

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An. I wanted so badly to write a Regulus fic but I couldn't get it to flow from his side of things, then I had a brainwave that lead to me writing a combo of Narcissa and Regulus. I am hoping its working out this way. Please let me know if its no good or tell me what ways to improve, be honest, I can take it :)

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	3. Chapter 3

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"I wasn't much like my sisters growing up. Bellatrix was so strong willed and Andromeda was beautiful, smart and witty."

Narcissa eyes sparkled under the mid-day sun.

"You may not know this but my teenage years weren't kind to me. Three years I was considered the ugly duckling, but when I turn fifteen things changed. My skin cleared, my height was normal again." She grinned at the look on Harry's face. " So with the knowledge I was no longer a freak, I decided I wanted to go to the big party with my sisters." Her smile fell. "It was the biggest mistake of my life."

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Regulus crawled up Narcissa bed sitting down next to her. He could tell she had been crying, she knew it. It was only noticeable to him, by the red colour around her eyes. She had been down at dinner a few minutes ago and no one saw. Maybe it was because no one paid her, as much attention as Regulus did. She was his world these days. Since Sirius had gone to school at Hogwarts, he had forgotten about his little brother. Narcissa however had taken him under her wing. She wasn't like the rest of the family. She wasn't loud or bigheaded. She put it down to her personal self-loathing for the past few years. But she had changed, the pimples were gone, her limbs no longer looked to large for her body. She had to admit finally she looked good.

So she had wanted to go to the party at the Lestranges estate with her sisters. Due to her age, her father said no. it was accustom that the pure-blooded child would join the adult world at sixteen. It was considered a warm up year to their coming of age, when they had rights to do as they pleased, but I was only fifteen.

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Harry noticed Narcissa sudden change of view. She had started as some watching their lives from above, detached from the story she was spinning. Now, without realising she was telling him more then she intended to. He didn't dare interrupted, hoping that she wouldn't notice her own slip up.

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Fifteen, I was only a year to young, the world seemed so unfair but I had Regulus with me at least. I let my head drop onto his shoulder. I knew, he knew, I had been crying. He was very observant for a boy of his age. It was hard for me to remember he was only nine not nineteen.

"Lets go." He whispered, not daring to speak loud, in case the elves heard.

I smiled at him, "Are you sure? Our fathers will murder us." I whispered back, looking into his dark eyes. He shrugged.

"I'd be more worried about my mother." He shuddered. I giggled.

"We'll just go and watch, no harm, no foul right?" He smiled and I returned him one.

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"It was one of the few times I agreed to do something so incredible foolish."

Narcissa sighed, taking another sip of her tea.

" So we smuggled our way into the ball."

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I had never felt so nervous in my life. I clutched Regulus's hand in mine. We both had gotten dressed up in case we were sighted. It was better to blend, in these kinds of situations. We crept along the top floor looking down at the dancers in pretty dresses. I was in awe at how beautiful Andromeda looked amongst the crowd. Bellatrix was in a conversation with the two Lestrange men. I hated the idea of my sister wanting to marry Rodolphus. He was a horrible man, with a wicked past. My opinion amounted to nothing in Bellatrix's eyes. She always got what she wanted, sadly she had chosen him. I suppose in a way they worked together as a perfect couple. She was getting older now, nineteen and not betrothed yet. Our father never promised us to any suitor like his father did to him. We had a choice. I just wished Bellatrix would of picked more wisely.

"I don't see what all the fuss is about. This is boring." Regulus scowled down at the people below us.

"It's not about the action, it's all about the tension in the air, in trick of the tongue." Yes this world is what I understood. False smiles and cheap flattery, could get you anywhere in society.

Regulus gave me a look that said please tell me your joking. Foolishly, I laughed. I knew it hadn't been that loud but Bellatrix was truly something else. Regulus grabbed my arm yanking me to the ground, as her eyes gazed over the area we had just been standing in.

"Something is not right about this party." Regulus whispered in my ear. We slid forward looking between the rails.

Everyone was talking in hushed whispers, there was no real life to the party, the dancing was even so mellow.

Narcissa had snuck out, when her father had a similar party, but it was nothing like this.

"Your right. Look." I pointed to my own father and mother who were leaving. It was far to early for them to be leaving. I frown, watching as my Father grabbed hold of Andromeda and my mother moved to get Bellatrix. Even from a height I could tell Bellatrix was refusing to go. I was shocked when my mother gave her one last scolding look before leaving without her.

"I think we better get out of here." I whispered to Regulus frantically.

We got off the ground, turning to go down the stairs but the voices echoing up made us run into the first unlocked door. We flew into a cabinet big enough to hide the pair of us. I don't think I had been so terrified in my whole life. The voices entered the room.

Abraxas Malfoy and Mr Goyle were the ones I recognised first, but the other voices I wasn't clear on. Bellatrix and I often use to try and hear what was going on in our fathers study, when they came around. It was clear that a war was coming, we wanted to know everything. Bellatrix wanted to join the action and I was scared of it happening. Our family was one of the oldest blood-lines left and this Dark Lord wanted my father and our Uncle on board. I was so incredible happy the night we over heard father would not join in some pointless squabble but would possible send some money to the cause. It didn't take me long to work out what was going on in the room. This party had been to recruit members for the fight. That was why my family had left. I reached over clutching Regulus's hand.

" My son Lucius will fight for you my Lord. I am proud to give you the heir to my line."

Regulus gasped beside me and suddenly the room went silent. At that moment my heart stopped beating. Suddenly the door outside opened and another person entered the room distracting the small group.

I heard the footsteps draw closer to our hiding place. I pulled Regulus behind me, protectively, as the door cracked open. I was meet with a pair of surprised gray eyes. It was Lucius Malfoy, he seemed torn, turning to shut the cupboard again. I could see threw the crack he was standing in front of the door. He stayed silent, and I felt the relief flood over me.

"What are you hiding?" A voice hissed.

I felt every muscle in my body tense up.

"Move aside boy." He hissed.

The shadow of Lucius disappeared from my view. I fell into instant panic. I told Regulus to stay put, as Lucius opened the door, giving me an apologetic look. I stepped out, careful not to let anyone see Regulus. I stood close to Lucius, the lesser of evils. He had tried to save my skin, at least he wouldn't try to hurt me.

"And who might you be?" The question seemed to send shudders down my spine. Maybe it was those red glowing eyes glued on me that had shaking as I answered.

"Narcissa Black." I watched as Voldemort's eyes trailed up and down me. The only thing keeping me from running right then was Malfoy's hand that had slid around my back. He must of sensed my fear moving closer to me.

"What are you doing here Miss Black?" His words were cruel and harsh. I had never experience anything like him. Bellatrix could be cold but not this cold.

"I asked her to come to meet me tonight." Lucius spoke before I had the chance. I don't know what possessed him to cover for me, but I was forever thankful he did. "She's a pretty little thing, is she not?" I knew what he was playing at, but I was not impressed.

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." The Dark Lord hissed. It was then that I realised how scared Lucius was of him too. His fingers on my back began to shake against me skin.

"So Miss Black, can you tell me why it is that your family has not stayed tonight?" I realised then, whatever words slip threw my lips could destroy us all.

"They aren't the kind of people who get involved in anyone else business. The Blacks have been part of nothing, ever. They do not pick sides, they do not fight. They throw money around to show their loyalties but never themselves. Unsurprisingly being a Black means you never have to work a day in your life. I am pretty sure none us would know how." I was nervous even as he laughed cruelly. Unfortunately he sobered up fast.

"Now tell me why you Uncle hasn't give us his heir." I frowned. Was this Sirius future? To become part of this war? We as Black's never gotten involved in this sort of thing, but this time it didn't seem to matter if you were practically royalty, no wizard was spared.

"Uncle Orion, is a great man." I paused cautious of my words. "His son is young, not school age yet. Uncle will not let Sirius go so young. He is after all his heir. It takes years to train a young silly boy into a man, into a Black. Being a Black means a lot of things, there are rules that apply to us, that do not apply to the rest of the world. There are responsibilities, traditions that must be up held. Orion will not let Sirius join cause like yours if he is not trained. He puts education before anything else. He won't let Sirius do anything until he has finished school. His son is young and temperamental, he needs to be taught to be a Black before he is taught to be a warrior." I looked into the Lords red eyes. "I am sure when the time comes Uncle Orion will do the right thing."

"You're a smart girl for your age." He smiled evilly. "When will you be joining me, like your sister?" The question stumped me for a moment.

"I am afraid I won't be any use to you. Bellatrix has strength and power I do not possess. I am just a silly young girl with idol words. Nothing more. I meant to be a trophy wife, I wasn't built for fighting." They all seemed to find this rather amusing. It was all true, there was no point pretending otherwise. We were interrupted by the Lestrange boys who called the older men away. I was left with Lucius Malfoy. I was shaking as I moved over to the cupboard letting Regulus out.

"Come on, we'll get you back home." Lucius looked worried.

"You should be here. It's not safe, your not even of age."

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Narcissa smiled grimly putting down her empty cup.

"That was the first time we both laid eyes on the Dark Lord."

She signalled for her elf to remove the tea tray.

"I think that is enough for today. I'll see you tomorrow Mr Potter."

Harry nodded, thanking her for the tea.

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AN. This chapter is slightly different again. I am going to swap and change a bit as the story goes on, depending on Narcissa'a mood and mine. :P if it's to hard to follow let me know and I 'll change it.


	4. Chapter 4

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"Do you like my roses? I know everyone thinks the red is the best colour but these white ones are truly glorious."

Harry looked at Narcissa as if she was mental. "Um, yeah, there nice."

Narcissa scowled but it quickly faded into a soft smile. "Yes my Draco doesn't understand the beauty in flowers either." She sighed. "So I am guessing you still want to hear more about Regulus."

Harry nodded.

"Well I guess the next time I worried about my baby cousin was when I came back from school on the holidays."

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I had never seen Regulus so depressed. It was a look I grew use to in those early years, until he leant to wear his blank face. Sirius had been ignoring him for the Potter boy more and more. Regulus had been moping, for weeks according to Bellatrix who had been visiting Aunt and Uncle regularly. I went up to his room to find the door locked. Aunt said he'd done it magically and had refuse to lifted it. Only Kreacher had been allowed in to give him food. It surprised me that he'd done it but I guess it wasn't unexpected.

I knocked on the door, and heard a muffled voice.

"Go away."

"It's Cissy."

Instantly the door opened. I stepped inside and it snapped shut. Regulus lay on the middle of his floor staring at the ceiling with the saddest face I had ever seen. Silently I sat down went to him.

"Your home." I nodded laying down beside him. I didn't dare speak yet.

"Things aren't going so well. I think maybe, we're all doomed."

At that point I was scared. What had happened to the playful, sneaky little boy I had left behind? What could possible of happened to make him like this?

"Why are we doomed?" I said softly. I wasn't sure I wanted an answer.

"Because we're Black."

"Oh." Is all I could say.

I could of given him a elegant reply but deep in the gut of my stomach I knew he was right. Being Black was a very limited lifestyle. Black's never lived long, I was hoping that is why he talking like this, nothing more serious.

"Your sister is going to drown."

I leaned over him, looking him square in the eye.

"Regulus."

"She is getting in to deep, there will be a time when floundering won't cut it. Then what will we do? The sharks can't be kept at bay for much longer. We've only got until the tide changes."

"Regulus, your scaring me. What happening?"

"Doesn't matter, come, we should make an appearance at dinner. It has been awhile since I've graced them with my presences." A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips as he waltzed out the door.

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Narcissa looked over to Harry. "It was only the beginning for Regulus. He was on a downward spiral, but you can only fall for so long before you hit the bottom." She sighed sadly.

"He started his first year at Hogwarts when I was in my last. Up until then I had never truly noticed the age gap, he was always wiser then his years."

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As he walked through the doors of the great hall, he frowned. It was the first difference I noticed between the two brothers. Sirius's eyes had light up when he had seen the starlight ceiling, however Regulus wasn't like his brother. It seemed as if the world was mocking him, he refused to look up as the other children gushed over the roof. No, he did not stand in awe of something as trivial as the stars. He wanted more in life. It was the moment I had feared, the sorting. I wondered if my little Regulus would join the house of the brave like his brother, maybe the house of the wise. I never thought he would be with me, in the house of the serpent. He sat silently by my side, not a word uttered from his lips. His face became the blank canvas I came to know well. The other children around us were silent. They knew what the name Black meant, they knew he was nothing like his trouble making brother, the green said it all.

Sirius ignored his brother, not wanting to have anything to do with the Slytherins.

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Narcissa laughed at the look on Harry's face. "Yes, house rivalry was stronger then blood. Sirius cared more about your father and his friends then he ever did about his baby brother. His mind was locked on the knowledge of his werewolf friend, not the trouble Regulus was going through. I was there, for the start at least." She sighed.

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Regulus was a gifted student without trying, just like Sirius. Classes didn't faze him, but I couldn't help but note his lack of friends. I, myself didn't have friends as such, admires of my wealth and power but not true friends. Even still someone was better then no one. I attempted to introduce him to a friend of mines little brother Garth but it didn't end so well. Garth was in the hospital wing for a week. I still don't know what happened but I did wonder. He was fine talking to teachers and adults alike but he couldn't seem to connect with other kids.

I was beginning to fear he would never find anyone his own age to get along with until one day I stumble on his first meeting with his only friend, Arielle.

He was walking down the hall reading as he went when he walked straight into a girl who was sorting through her bag as she turned the corner. In all honesty, it looked quiet comical as they both fell crashing to the ground. She was a Hufflepuff first year, running late for her class only to turn a corner and smash into Regulus.

"Do I get a wish?" She laughed standing up first, offering out her hand to him.

"Wish?" I was surprised to see he took it.

"Well you're a fallen star right?" He laughed, smiling for the first time in almost a year. I smiled to myself, not caring that she was most likely a mud-blood, all that mattered was, that she made him laugh. I walked away leaving them in peace, Regulus didn't need his big cousin watching over him now. I was please finally, that at least when I left Hogwarts, he would have most one to spend time with.

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"That was the first and only year we were together at Hogwarts, after that I can only tell you what I can." She looked at Harry. "I think that might be enough for today, Mr Potter." He nodded.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" She nodded.

"It's seems so."

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An. So it's been awhile sorry, tell me what you think on this one, I not so sure if it's working out alright. Let us know either way ;P


	5. Chapter 5

Narcissa brought him to the tea room once again. Harry was greeted with scones and cake. They looked so delicate and delicious, that Harry couldn't help but take one.

"I suppose I'll just jump right into the story then. You don't seem one for small talk, Mr Potter."

"Yes, that would be good."

"Hmm, let me think." She delicately placed down her tea cup.

"I suppose the next few years, there wasn't a great deal that would interest you."

"I will listen to whatever you are willing to tell me Mrs Malfoy."

She raised her eyebrow, in a look Harry had experienced many times with her son. She didn't say anything, continuing her story.

"In his second year Regulus became the Slytherin seeker but that wasn't really that important. At least not compared to the bomb shell that rocked our family to it's core."

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It was the last thing I had expected. I was only eighteen, naïve enough to have not noticed Andromeda's behaviour but the others had. I would of liked to stayed blissful ignorant when it came to that day, it would have been nice not to know but that's not how the story goes.

Bellatrix was the one to bring our family to it's knees. If only she had left things alone. If only.

However she wasn't the first. It was Christmas and Regulus was home. I was so happy to see him. The year I had experienced in the adult world had been a tad dull and boring. I was learning very quickly to hold my tongue and that a woman's place was at a mans side and nothing more. So when my dear cousin came home I was delighted. Regulus had always been that spark of life, that brightened my day.

The holidays had started off well. Sirius had only cause minor dramas, staying at the Potter's most days. Andromeda had taken up reading in the library. Bellatrix was in love and ranting about how great the Dark Lord was. Between the vial husband of hers and the dark Lord, I wasn't sure who was worse. Bellatrix was growing more power hungry and crazy by the day but for Christmas she promised our mother she'd hold back with the death eater talk. It was strange know how our parents disapproved of Bellatrix's place under Lord Voldemort as much as they did with Sirius in the house of the loin. Sirius had broken tradition and was pushing his idealistic views of unity while Bellatrix had signed up as a slave to fight anything impure. Both had taken opposite sides in the looming war which made things painfully awkward or just plan painful. I had caught them shooting hexes at each other at every opportunity. Thankful Sirius decided to steer clear of the house, he'd practically moved in with the Potter's which in some ways made thing easier but in other ways made things so much harder. Regulus was growing bored without his brother. He was becoming a sneaky little spy, snooping on everyone.

All in all it seemed to be a good Christmas with minimal damage.

That was until I found Regulus pacing, wearing holes in the carpet. I watched him go up and down the halls many times before I interrupted him.

"What's wrong Reggie?" I asked softly.

"Andromeda." He groaned and went back to pacing. "What was she think?" He asked me suddenly.

"Regulus? What do you know, that I don't?"

"She's been seeing someone." I knew already, it was hard to keep secrets in the Black household. I practiced my tongue holding skills and let her be, knowing all to well what it was like trying to deal with the pure-blooded males.

"Yes, she has."

He growled, angrily. "But a Mud-blood? Does she have an idea of the consequences? It's not like they can make her leave him, walk away and pretend nothing ever happened."

"Why not? It's just a harmless fling. She'll get bored sooner or later."

Regulus scoffed. "Yeah, that's likely." The sarcasm, I would of expected off Sirius, not Regulus. It made me wonder, My eyes narrowing. He knew something, I still didn't.

"When she's got his bun in the oven."

She gasped. We turned, our faces instantly paled as our eyes meet with Bellatrix.

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"I would like to say our parents were smart and let her stay and loved her despite her position, but then I would be lying. So too would it be to say, Bellatrix kept her mouth shut." Narcissa looked into her tea cup. "But you already know Mr Potter, that she was shunned."

The guilt and sorrow was evident in her voice. The two sisters had rekindle their relationship after the war but it was still built on rocky ground.

"Mrs Malfoy, could possible tell me what happened to Andromeda when your parents found out?"

"You've been to the Ancient and most noble house have you not?"

Harry nodded. "If my Aunt's picture seems like a kitten compared to what my own mother said to Andy that day." She shuddered. "No Mr Potter, some memories need to stay locked away. If you want to know, ask her yourself. It is not my story to tell." Harry nodded.

" After the dramas of Andromeda's departure we had two almost peaceful; years. Or at least compared to Andy's secret it all seem trivial and unimportant. Possible that was just me. I was grieve for the lost of a sister, struggling with becoming a woman, the first quite year I was nineteen. The last teenage year I was privileged to."

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As a woman now, had only a few short years before I had to marry. Balls became the up most of importance. I was a pretty girl but there were more beautiful women there. The men that I attracted wanted power and money, a wife from the Black family was quite a trophy. These men I tried to steer clear from. Those balls were like living hell for me in the beginning. And I thought about was the night Regulus and I had snuck into that ball, watching from above. I had enjoyed the atmosphere back then but now I feared it. One slip of the tongue could make or break you. I learnt to hold my tongue, something I had rarely done as a girl. I learnt the of the power Lord Voldemort was gaining.

The balls became not only a place of word play but a power play. I stayed in the corner watching as Bellatrix became one of the most noticeable people in the room. She had become important to the cause. The thought made me shuddered. I knew what they did, what my own sister had become, a murder.

With one child banished and the other a power grabbing killer I realised I had to up hold the name of Black, all alone.

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Narcissa grinned. "Maybe not quite alone, I still had Regulus but things weren't looking good. It was like we were just bidding our time until the war broke out. It had started yes, but it was stoppable. If only someone had done something back then, we would of never ended up here."

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While I was off learning how to become another mindless doll, Regulus was diving into his sport with a passion. Unfortunately it lead to many clashes between the brothers. Sirius would insult the Slytherin team and Regulus would call James Potter a cheat. They would fight, throwing curses down the halls at each other. It wasn't often a safe place to be on their floor. Merlin I can remember some of the injuries they inflicted upon each other. It was on day on a school break I went round to see them only to bump into Sirius on his way out. His nose bleeding, bruises covering his forearms.

"Tell the Witch I am going to James's." He hissed at me on the way past. I sighed walking into the House of Black. I sought out Regulus first. He was sitting in the middle of the hall, back leant up against the horrid wall paper. A grim smile graced his lips as his eyes meet mine.

"Cissy." He greeted me warmly as his voice would allow, the pain leaking through.

"Oh Reg." I almost cried, seeing what Sirius had done to him. He was just a kid. He probably had earned it but I still wish the pair of them could use words instead of coming to blows. I guess they were boys and it was to be expected.

I sat down by Regulus, he told me of his friend Arielle, the girl how spoke in riddles while I undid the damage his brother had done. I was happy to find Regulus had some one to share time with when we were parted. Hearing tales of Hogwarts made me realise how much I missed it.

The world seemed so different to me after Hogwarts. I feared for my future, for my right of freedom. Bellatrix grew stronger and more powerful by the day under Lord Voldemort. I tried to stay clear of her as much as possible. She was trying to recruit everyone she could. It to know that her new Master was more important to her then her family. I guess I should of seen it coming, Regulus certainly did.

"She's just bitter that she's a girl. She wants money and power. You know the power our name holds." He chuckled darkly. "She should have been the heir of the house of Black. Didn't you ever notice how she is with Sirius?"

I frowned. "They clash, different personalities, different thoughts and opinions. They both see the world through different eyes." I found myself challenged talking to Regulus theses days. He was only thirteen but he was smarter then me. He's friend Arielle, the girl who spoke in riddles had changed his views of late. It was hard to tell were he stood on most subjects but I always knew, he'd stand with me.

"She's jealous." I raised a single eyebrow. Bellatrix jealous? I didn't think so but I was certain Regulus would change my mind. "Sirius stole what should have been hers by simply being born. It angers her to see him throw it all away. He is defiant to the end, the pigheaded Griffindor, breaking all Black traditions. Voldemort offers her the power, the position she wants so desperately but it's still not what she truly wants. She thinks she should have been heir and ever given the chance she'd kill Sirius for it."

"What makes you so sure?" I scowled, not liking the path the conversation had gone down.

"What makes you think I am wrong?"

I didn't say a thing. My silence, saying the words I didn't dare utter. Nothing.

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AN. Ok guys tell me what you think of my regulus. I personally hate these whiny, teary versions and refuse write him as such unless I find it absolutely necessary. *grins* hope you like. P.s a review would be nice if you have the time ;)

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	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I swear not to claim ownership of the character, time or place…and everything else, please don't sue ok??

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Narcissa looked at Harry's stunned face. "It seems that even in death Regulus still knew the ending better then I. When I heard from Lucius that Bellatrix was the one who had killed Sirius all I could think about was Regulus. He always knew best, my little Regulus but even he couldn't predict what was to come."

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I was twenty. It seemed such an official number, twenty, no longer a young teenage girl but a year away from being a woman. I was stuck in the middle. Too old to be naïve of the world around me and to young for it to matter.

Nothing had changed much. The world kept moving as much as I wished it didn't. Bellatrix scared me, her mood and thoughts black as night. We didn't spend much time together these days but on the days we did I often wished we didn't.

It was a typical Thursday night, our parents were off being seen at different events, our cousins were still in school and the house was quite. I should of realised it then. The house of Black was never silent. It was the calm before the storm, a storm that would be the down fall of our family but for now we were waiting. There was nothing worse then waiting for the enviable. Much like there was nothing worse then looking up from your book finding your sister staring at you with an unnatural morbid fascination.

It took everything not to scream but I couldn't keep the fear from my eyes as I looked at my big sister. Her dress was soaked in blood, her shoes were missing. Her normally prefect hair was wild and her stiff posture was gone. None of that matter to me at that moment, it was the look on her face that had me shaken to the core.

I had seen her after attacks on muggles before, she had been so what remorseful. Not now.

The look on her face was the one she wore for her husband, a look of love and lust.

"You'll never guess what I did today." She smirked playfully, sitting on the end of my bed.

"I would hope not." I whispered fearfully. I prayed to Merlin she wouldn't say a word of the horrors she had inflicted. I had heard more then enough about stringing people up by their ankles and watching them struggle under the unforgivable curses.

Bellatrix sighed dramatically flopping across the foot of my bed.

"You really are no fun."

"How sad." I replied dryly. She scowled at me, ignoring the comment.

"You never guess who finally got his mark today."

"No I suppose I won't." I tried not to encourage her in any way but I could tell she had something to say and I was going to have to listen whether I liked it or not.

"Lucuis, Lucuis Malfoy. You remember him from Hogwarts?" I nodded not liking the sudden twisted in conversation. I was expecting her I killed people and enjoyed every second of it so when she brought up Malfoy I was momentarily blind sighted.

"Did you know he fancies you?" I could feel my own jaw drop as she giggled and waltzed back out the door. I was in shock. I had seen Malfoy at numerous parties over the last year and every time I saw him looking my way I thought it was because of the stunt Regulus and I had pulled all those years ago. Lucuis was very desirable amongst the pure blood witches and I found it hardly likely he truly was interested in me. I felt the dread sinking into my bones, Bellatrix was setting me up.

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Narcissa smirked at the look on Potters face. "Bellatrix did cause a lot of trouble in her day, and most of it she inflicted upon her own flesh and blood. I have to say Regulus had an easier run when it came to her match making skills." Narcissa laughed at the memory. "Regulus was fourteen at this stage and home for the holidays along with Sirius. We were having a family dinner, just us children thankfully."

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"I got word that your dating another Mudblood." Bellatrix hissed down the table at Sirius.

He snorted. " Any old mud blood has more class then you." She ripped out her wand pointing it straight at Sirius.

"You better watch your mouth boy." The venom leaking from her lips was terrifying. Sirius took it all in his stride. There was nothing more he liked then to annoy Bellatrix.

"What? No insults for Regulus. He's dating a Hufflepuff!" Sirius accused.

"Your what?" Bellatrix turned from Sirius to Regulus who was staring holes into the wall.

"I am not dating anyone, she's just a friend." His eyes didn't move from there spot and his voice sounded as bored as ever.

"Who is she?" Bellatrix growled.

"The riddle girl." Sirius let out his bark like laugh.

Regulus turned at the sound, his eyes landing on his brother. "When did you speak to Ari?"

"None of your business." Sirius glared.

Regulus raised an eyebrow before turning back to face an angry Bellatrix.

"Her name is Arielle Airwind. You wouldn't find her name on any pureblood book nor muggle, she wouldn't be the riddle girl after all." Regulus smirked as Sirius let out an irritated huff.

"I am going to James's." He announced.

"When are you not?" Regulus scowled at his brother. Sirius gave him a filthy look before going out the side door.

"I am going to have words with him." Bellatrix hissed heading straight after Sirius. I looked across the empty table to Regulus, a small smile played across his lips.

"You like her." I accused.

He quickly denied it. "No."

I gave him a questioning look but didn't push it, he was young there was plenty of time for love in the future.

"She's not a muggle and she's not a pureblood and I have a feeling I won't find her as a half blood either. But you know who she really is don't you?" I grinned.

He laughed.

"It took me awhile but I figured it out. When Sirius called her the riddle girl he wasn't wrong. Her name is a trick, a play on words almost. Airwind. She is the heir of the Wind family."

"Really?" There was a rumour of their survival but nothing solid. They were one of the oldest families, they pre-dated the Blacks even but all my thought were gone by the sudden screaming and yelling in the hall. We both bolted out into the passageway. There was something wrong this time, the anger wasn't on their lips, no, there was nothing but pure hatred.

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Narcissa looked at Harry thoughtfully. "I think that fight may have been the beginning of the feud burning between the pair. I would like to say I could explain it but I missed the important part while I was discussing girls with Regulus." She brushed down the fabric of her skirt.

"You Know I never really thought about Arielle much, I couldn't even tell you if she is still alive but the impacted this girl had on Regulus was something I could never forget. Those holidays I asked a lot of questions about his friend purely to watch the life flood back into his face. Yes if anything Arielle was someone who made him smile and that was a lot more then I could manage. Except when Regulus decided to tease me about Malfoy."

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When Regulus started asking me about Lucius, I began to wonder if he was having that house-elf of his Kreacher follow me. He often seemed to know things he shouldn't, spying on all of us I had decided. I began watching but it was easy to see it wasn't the elf. It was a puzzle for quite some time until I stumble into the answer.

I turned down the hall finding him speaking with the painting.

"And what did my father say?"

The Black in the frame didn't seemed to like the tone Regulus used with him.

"Your father is a smart man, he knows it's time to pick a side."

Regulus let out a frustrated growl, punching the wall next to the picture. "Can't you talk sense to him?"

"We have a visitor." The Black ancestor bowed his head before walking off through the frame.

"So now I know your little secret. Why are you spying on Uncle?"

"That's none of your concern." He snapped.

I was surprised at the emotion in him. It had been a long while since he expressed anything at all.

"This is how you heard Bellatrix and my conversation?" I glared.

He smirked. "Nope, I was listening at the door."

"Lair."

"It takes one to know one." He retorted.

"Very mature of you." I laughed as he broke out in a grin. "Where's Sirius?"

Regulus scowled. "Last I saw screaming at our Mother but since the house is silent, I assume he would of gone over to James to sulk about how horrible his noble pure-blood family is." I felt for Regulus, I really did. When Andromeda left I was torn up, but things with Regulus and Sirius were different. When Andy had left I still had Bellatrix. Sure we were never as close as Andy and I, but I could rely on Bellatrix to be there. Andy had perhaps left a bigger hole with Bellatrix then she did with me. It was odd to think Bellatrix was close with anyone now but I remember catching the pair of them talking late into the night about silly things. They use to be like Regulus and me. With one simple mistake they broke apart, I wonder if Regulus and I would end up the same.

Regulus wanted his brother around more then me, I knew but Sirius was never there. In some ways I was thankful to have Regulus to myself. No one else truly appreciated the kind of talent the boy had under his mask.

Regulus rolled his eyes at my disapproving look. "Not everyone can live up to Malfoy's standard."

I growled at him, Regulus burst out laughing running down the hall. Cursing him, I ran after him. All I could think was how childishly I was acting when I smashed into something solid. I fell to the floor looking up to find the last person I wanted to see the Malfoys.

"Watch where you are going." Lucius Sneered.

Behind him Regulus mocked him. I fought down the laughter raising from my chest as Regulus put his fingers up to make devil horns behind Lucius head. I choked on a giggle as I quickly apologised. Albraxas glared down his nose as he pushed past to my father's office, Lucius turned sighting Regulus leaning in a bored manner against the wall.

"Malfoy." He nodded politely. I bite my lip, trying my hardest not to laugh. I watched as Lucius eyes narrowed.

"Black." There was a hint of anger that suggested Malfoy had known what Regulus had been up to.

"Did you need us to show you to the office?" The sarcasm dripped off Regulus's lips like poison.

Malfoy scowled.

"Thank-you but I am sure I can manage." He hissed.

He stormed down the hall after his father as I broke out in laughter. I looked up at Regulus.

"Merlin your horrible." He smirked.

"I like the guy, it takes class to storm out of a room like that and he's going to be doing that a lot when you get married."

"We are not getting married. Just because Bellatrix says he likes me, does not make it so."

"I can confirm Trixie's assessment if you like?" He took a step towards the office door.

"Don't you dare!" I hissed dragging him away.

"But don't you want to know if Lucifer loves you?"

I glared not saying a word, the look was enough.

Thank-Merlin I never had a little brother.

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Narcissa smiled at Harry. " I was young and foolish once, don't look so shocked."

"Lucifer?"

Narcissa grinned. "That stays between you and me."

Harry nodded. " So then what happened?"

" The tension that had been growing amongst the Black's broke out. Two rather peaceful years had come to pass until the next year, when I was twenty-one. "

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AN. Hope your all still liking this, Let me know what you think, I am pretty sure this is the oddest way I have ever written…. :P


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own anything it belongs to J.k

(seen the movie, loved it)

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"Why are you here Harry? What is it that you are so desperate to know?" Narcissa suddenly asked.

"I need to know what made him do it, I need to know what turned him evil. What made him become a death eater?"

"Regulus was never evil." Her words were like ice. Suddenly Harry realised he was playing on fire. This woman held the secrets and more power then he would ever know. "Foolish maybe, but he was never evil. You weren't there Potter, you have no idea what it was like for us growing up during the war."

"Sirius said he liked the power, he said..."

Narcissa let out a low hiss.

"You want to know why Regulus became a death eater?" Her eyes narrowed. "Do you really Mr Potter?"

He nodded his jaw clenched in determination.

"So be it."

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As I walked into my Aunt's house I couldn't help but notice how grand it truly was. Deep rich colours highlighted with gold trimmings glowed under old gas lamps. There was nothing more charming then the classic beauty of the family home. Even the troll's foot I thought was particularly ugly wasn't out of place. I tried not to think of Andy looking at it, she always somehow manage to catch herself on it and stumbling and cursing. Bellatrix and Narcissa had even taken to placing bet on how long it would take her to clash with it. They had always said how they would love to through it out but today I felt different. They needed something ugly, a constant reminder that they weren't prefect, that even the Black's had flaws. Not only did it serve as a ugly reminder, it was one of the last remaining items that could be connected to Andromeda. It was the sign of their ugly failure.

As I thought of Andoremda I thought of my own pending doom. Malfoy had been flirting shamelessly. Bella had been right, I was in trouble. Malfoy I could live with, he was handsome enough but it was the baggage that would come along with him. He was a death eater now, he was part of something I didn't want to be involved in.

"I thought girls were meant to have things for shoes not feet." Sirius teased from the top of the staircase. I narrowed my eyes as he laughed.

"SIRIUS!" a screamed hurled from behind him. For a fleeting moment he looked frightened but it was quickly turned into determination.

"Move!" He growled, swinging a leg of the rail. I move swiftly as he slide down the wood. He was up and running before his feet touched the ground and more anguished screams grew closer.

"I wonder what he did this time." Bellatrix said in a bored tone. "You would think by sixteen he would of grown up." I shrugged, Sirius had always been well Sirius, I highly doubt he would ever grow up. I watched as Aunt stormed down the stairs she stopped at the bottom look at us.

"Down to the right." Bellatrix ratted him out, following our Aunt. She loved to watch the fight. I turned, anyone else would have jumped but I was adjusted to Regulus appearing out of nowhere.

"Do I want to know?" I indicated to the screaming match going on the other side of the house.

Regulus's lips twitched just a little. "You should see."

I followed Regulus up to Sirius's room. The door still wide open where the argument had started. I looked at the walls, coated in naked women along with muggle machines.

"They won't come off." Regulus said in the most casual tone. I looked at Regulus for a long second before we both burst out laughing. Sirius was a dead man.

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Narcissa smirked watching Harry laughing.

"Yes, I can't say Sirius ever changed much." She sighed, mood dropping.

"Now I am sure you've heard about Sirius leaving us but quiet like this."

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It was Christmas and the Black's had joined together in their usual celebration. Even good old Uncle Alphard had turned up. It was a big family affair that extended out into the pureblood community. Everyone who was a somebody was there, dancing in the main hall. I was horrified to see Bellatrix coming toward Regulus and me. Bellatrix I could handle, it was the men she brought with her. Her husband Lestrange, BJ otherwise known as Barty Crouch and Malfoy. I moved closer to Regulus. Sensing my tension he turned to watch the group moving towards us.

"You would think they would learn to be subtle." He leaned back against the wall pulling off his not interested attitude. But I knew better, he's eyes calculating and cold. Seeing his strength brought back mine. He was a kid and yet he had more courage then me. At fifteen I would have never the guts, the sly intellect to deal with the on coming attack like Regulus did. I think that when I realised what my cousin was, who he was. He had trained himself for this, he was ready for the war since that night we hid in the cupboard. He had become strong, silent, cunning and in control.

"That's not really Bella's style."

"Perhaps not."

We stood silent, a force joined together to fight the common enemy.

"Hello dear sister, cousin." Bellatrix nodded to Regulus who just raised a single eyebrow. Bellatrix's false smile turned to a glare and Regulus smirked. He pushed himself off the wall ready for the on slaught. As luck would have it she turned her attention onto me. "You remember Lucius Malfoy?"

"Narcissa." He purred. He took my hand kiss my hand, bowing politely.

"Malfoy." I snapped.

How could I forget him? He had been quiet obvious with his intensions with me. Every ball I would somehow run into his gloating, arrogant face.

"Now, now sister, there is no need for that tone." Bellatrix grilled me with a crooked smile.

"Did you want something?" Regulus interrupted. "We were talking."

I had never seen Bellatrix look so mad, as when she looked at him that night.

"Spirit, I find that in a most interesting quality." We all froze. "I like to break it." I felt Regulus's tense arm brush against mine. Bellatrix was the first to recover from the shock of the Dark Lords appearance. She bowed and commented on how beautiful he looked, not daring to look him in the eye. I had never seen fear in my sister until I saw her in the presence of Voldemort, nor had I seen her so lustful. Regulus snorted back a laugh.

"Don't you dare laugh in the dark Lord's presence." Lestrange pointed his wand at Regulus throat.

Regulus took a step forward, daring Lestrange to strike him. "You forget, you are only here because I allow it, I would suggest you hold your tongue."

I grabbed his arm dragging him away, my eyes locked on Voldemort's face. He was laughing. The cold cruel sound attracting attention of the room.

"Who are you kid?" The dark Lord focus in on Regulus, I felt him shudder and yet I knew none of the others saw it. If my arm hadn't been against his I wouldn't of known how scared he truly was. His voice didn't falter, his body language reflecting it's usual lack of interest. I began to see just how hard my little cousin worked every single day to gain control.

"Black, Regulus Black." He held Voldemort's eye contact not breaking it like Bellatrix did. I felt a shiver run down my spine as the look in Voldemort's eyes changed. Only for a second I saw acceptance and I was scared. The fear I suddenly felt for Regulus overcame the fear I had for myself. Regulus had unknowingly just earned the respect of the darkest wizard to ever walk the earth.

"Bellatrix."

"Yes Master." My stomach plunged.

"Bring him to me when he comes of age."

"Yes my Lord."

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"Don't give me that look Potter." Narcissa scowled.

"What look?" Harry tried to clear his emotions.

She glared continuing her story.

"That wasn't the end of our year dramas, no Sirius decided to run off."

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Christmas always had emotions running high. The family all under one roof didn't help but the events that followed were inspected. We didn't realise what would happen that day, we didn't know it would be the last day we could call Sirius family.

It was early morning, Bellatrix and Sirius were screaming at each other at the top of their lungs, I sat down on the top step watching along with Regulus who was leaning, with his back against the wall. His eyes were closed but I knew he was listening. I felt an unnatural tension running through the air, like a cold chill sinking into my bones.

"What is happening?"

His eyes flashed open for a moment, his iris's settling on me. "Nothing."

I began to worry as he dropped his eyelids down. A lie or the plain truth wouldn't of fazed me but a nothing from Regulus was like a death sentence. Something was up. Something was very, very wrong.

"Reg?" I enquired softly.

He shook his head, not opening his eyes. I place my hand gently on his shoulder trying to comfort him. His eyes snapped open as he shoved himself off the wall knock my hand of him.

"Don't." He hissed. " Don't you dare."

I nodded seeing the anger burning in his eyes. He was after all a Black and sympathy wasn't something he wanted or approved of. I step away letting him storm down the hall. I sighed heading off to find Bellatrix. The house was silent which meant Sirius and my sister had parted ways. I followed the hall down to the dinning room where Bellatrix sat sulkily.

"Do you knew what blood traitor has gone and done?" She hissed, slamming her fist down on the table. I knew better then to answer her when she started her ranting. "That filthy scum has joined the order of the Phoenix. I told him the Dark Lord would have him as his own and that's the reply I get. My Master gets what he wants, and he wants the Black boys. I told Aunty of his foolishness, she is going to put him straight, you'll see."

"What?" I began to panic. My family was breaking apart, fighting on different sides of the war. Bellatrix on one side and Sirius on the other.

"Does Regulus know?"

"Oh, I am pretty sure he would been the first to know. He always knows."

I took off running, I had to get to Regulus.

I flew up the stairs, walking straight into the fight. We stood in a diamond, Aunt and Sirius opposite each other screaming, directly in front of me stood Regulus, still as stone.

"You are a shame to the name of Black! How dare you? You blood traitor!"

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" Sirius yelled back.

"Don't you dare speak to me like that! You don't deserve be a Black, you ungreatful worthless child."

Sirius stopped yelling, the air itself seem to freeze around him. I held my breath waiting, terrified.

He laughed quietly to himself to the point of tears. As he looked up to his mother, his eyes light with determination. "Did you ever think maybe I don't want to be a Black when our blood is dirtier then a mud-bloods."

"Get Out!" I had never heard her scream so loud in my life.

"Don't worry I am gone." He shoved pass Regulus, his little brother slamming against the wall. I ran to him, ignoring my Aunt's harsh words. Regulus stood still, his eyes wide as if in a daze. I tried to get anything out of him as he stood in shock. Only the echoing slam of the front door broke through to him. He let himself fall back against the wall, slowly sinking down onto the floor.

I barely noticed as my Aunt stormed off to find her husband, my mind stayed with Regulus. I moved to his side, watching him closely. I knew what this felt like but I couldn't understand why he didn't react. He didn't throw a fit and chuck things. He didn't cry. He just sat there.

I placed my hand on his. He looked up at me, his eyes searching for answers. "What am I meant to do now?" Answers I didn't have.

"I don't know."

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Narcissa glared angrily at Harry. "With Sirius gone, certain responsibility fell on Regulus's head. Responsibilities that should of never been placed on a fifteen year old."

Harry matched her glare with one of his own.

"That's right, Harry. Regulus became a death eater because he had too, he wasn't a coward like Sirius, he never walked away from us, he stayed until the bitter end."

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We both stood there staring at the Black family tapestry. Smoke still singed the vacant spot that had once been Sirius's name. The trail lightly drifting up the generations. It was the first time in years I had stopped to look at it. I looked to the whole next to my own name. It was just like the whole Andromeda had left in my heart.

I think that right then, that it was the moment I knew.

We both knew.

We knew what we had to do.

"I am going to have to marry Lucifer." I felt the tears run down my cheek as I turned to look at Regulus. I knew, what he had to face was much worse.

"I guess I should find Bellatrix to sign me up then." The consequences of what that meant left only a sigh on his lips. My heart bleed for him. He was just a kid.

"Just think, only the brave hero's die young." I joked trying to lighten the mood, trying to stop my mind from dropping into the darkness that would happily consume me.

"Good then. We're going to live for fucking ever."

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AN. That chapter almost killed me. Please, please. Please tell me what you thought and I hope to see you next one. ;)

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	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, and at this point in time I hope you realise that and if you are foolish enough to believe otherwise I envy your sanity or lack there of…

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"The next few years of my life, and the last few of Regulus we spent a lot of time together with Bellatrix." Narcissa sipped her tea. "Life with Bellatrix was never dull but it wasn't necessarily safe either."

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It was hard adjusting to the world without Sirius. When we lost Andromeda we lost our sweetness, our conscience. But when we lost Sirius we lost a lot more. It was hard to pin point what made Sirius's presences take up so much room. Bellatrix would have said it was his Gryffindor ego along with his fat head. Possibly, but I didn't think so. It could have been his defiance, his passion for his beliefs against the family traditions. Maybe his loud boisterous voice flaring up in a heated battle. Maybe, just perhaps it was because he brought something different to the table, something special.

None of the mattered now. He was gone and we had no choice but to move on. Still it was strange with the house so silent. It was just the three of us now.

It was school holidays and I was seeking out Regulus only to find Bellatrix first. I paused at Sirius's doorway looking in at my older sister. She sat on Sirius bed with a small frown on her face.

"Do you miss him?" I almost gasped at my own words. She jumped startled. Her heavily lidded eyes focused on mine.

"Don't be stupid, it's just." I watched her twitch in discomfort, struggling to find words for once in her life. I began thinking about Bellatrix and Sirius. They had always had a strange relationship. They duelled together for countless hours, shot hexes at each other in hallways, they screamed and yelled to they were blue in the face but it was all playful childish rivalry. They enjoyed fling hexes and curses around at each other. They enjoyed the challenge, the game. It was always just a bit of fun. I wondered when was the moment when it had stopped beginning a game, I wondered when was the moment they meant it.

"It wasn't meant to be this way. He was meant to be with us." She frowned again but this time it was directed over my shoulder. I turned finding Regulus standing behind me.

"No." He shook his head. "He was never with us."

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"Yes Mr Potter, even Bellatrix had her human side."

"But she hated Sirius, she killed him." Harry growled.

"She did." Narcissa sighed. "Regulus told me she would but I never believed him. I guess the girl I grew up with died in Azkban. Bellatrix was a different person back then, she was still the Dark Lord right hand man but she was still a Black. She hadn't quiet lost her soul yet."

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With Andromeda and Sirius gone, Bellatrix began spending more time with Regulus and me. She quiet often brought over her husband and her death eater friends.

I sat by Regulus who was glaring across at Lucius. I smiled, it was nice having someone on my side. Next to Malfoy was the Lestrange brothers who bickering over teams and brooms.

"He is not the best seeker in the league." I turned very slowly looking at Regulus. He began to join in the banter along with Malfoy. Bellatrix looked over at me and rolled her eyes.

"Boys."

We left them to there chat and wondered out into the dinning room. I frowned noticing the gleam in Bellatrix's eyes. She was up to something.

" You know now you are twenty-two you should find…"

I held up my hand knowing exactly where she was going with this. "I don't want to hear it."

She pouted for a mere second before grinning slyly. "Very well I won't say a word but you and Regulus must come to the Dark Lord party with me and the boys."

I sighed weighing up my options before realising at this stage in the game, we had none. We had dealt with our demons, we knew our fates. It was only a matter of when now, I had been hoping, praying for another year but nothing every turns out the way you want it too.

"Fine, I'll go but you have to ask Regulus yourself, I am not his keeper."

She smirked revealing her pointed teeth. " I am not stupid Cissy, I know you pair are joined at the hip, if you go, he'll go."

My stomach squirmed uncomfortable knowing she was right. Regulus and I had made a packed of sorts, unspoken but still there. We would stand together no matter what and Bellatrix knew it.

I had never been to a death eaters ball, at least not invited. I stood by Bellatrix feeling nervous. I glanced over at Regulus who had gone off with Bellatrix's husband and his brother.

"Malfoy will make a good husband you know." She breathed in my ear as I looked over to where Lucius stood. "His wealth may not be as plentiful as our own but it's nothing to be scoffed at sister." I frowned as my body stiffened. He looked over at us, as if he knew we were talking about him. I shivered under his gaze. I frightened my how easily he could effected me from such a distance. "He's no saint and I will never claim him to be one." That, I knew. He had the mark imprinted on his skin, the evil burnt into his flesh. He belonged to the dark Lord. "But he is a good man, sister. He will look after you." I began think of that time all those years ago when he had tried to shelter Regulus and myself form the dark Lord. Maybe, just maybe Malfoy still had a soul buried somewhere deep inside.

Without realising it, Bellatrix had convinced me that Lucius wasn't so bad. I didn't even feel the normal anger as we danced the night away, I felt something else.

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Parties blended together day after day. For a short while we had been free from it, for at least another half an hour. I sat on my bed, while Regulus was sprawled out across my carpet. His eyes darted here there and everywhere across the room. His eyes trailing the snitch he'd let loose that was slowly demolishing my breakables. He smirked as a rare hand mirror fell, crashing to the floor. My eyelids flickered shut as I tried to calm my burning anger.

"Those seven years are going on your head." I said opening my eyes, only to narrow them onto Regulus. He smirked.

"That's ok, your going to be doomed for entity, I hardly think seven years is going to be worse then dealing with Malfoy for the rest of your life."

I groaned dropping back across my bed. He was gloating, teasing me. I groaned again. I didn't know whether to be thankful to Bellatrix or whether I should murder her.

I sighed pushing myself back up. "Come Regulus. We better make an appearance before the Trixie comes to fetch us."

Regulus smirked pulling himself up. Neither of us dared to call Bellatrix, Trixie to her face, no that had been Sirius's job.

"We can't have that now, can we?" I glared at him. "Any besides," he winked. "Lucifer might finally get round to asking you to marry him." I throw a pillow at his head as he darted out the room.

We went down to the party our parents were holding to find the usual suspects. Goyle and Crabbe were chatting and eating by the food table. Our parents were floating around here and there being dutiful hosts. I felt a tug on my wrist as Regulus dragged me along with him. He pulled me over to where Bellatrix and gang of death eaters stood. I couldn't help but notices Bellatrix then. In all my years I had always thought of Andy as the beautiful child but that night I changed my mind. There was something darkly addictive about Bellatrix's laugh. Something elegant about her cocky stand. Something fascinating about the way she spoke. I had never notice the alluring darkness of her power, the lust it brought out in the men that stood around her. I had never seen anything quite like it.

"You've noticed." Regulus whispered in my ear.

"Noticed what?" I looked back at him.

He nodded over at my older sister as she affectionately patted her husbands hand. "Bellatrix. Her as a whole." I looked at him curiously then back to my sister. I frowned. I had seen all sides of my sister over the years but I had never found anything but fear until now at least. Now I was realising there might be a slim chance for us through her. She had power. It was well known how high up the ranks she was, along with Lucius. If there was a chance for us, I knew we had to take it. I frown ever so faintly, hoping against hope that Regulus didn't notice.

If we were going to do this then we were going the whole way.

That night I began playing a dangerous game. I entered the battle with motives Bellatrix couldn't understand nor did I care to explain them. I smiled and my flirtatious actions were noticed. Malfoy seemed to be enjoying my sudden interest, however Bellatrix remained wary.

It was until later in the night when I found Bellatrix's hand wrapped firmly around my wrist did I pause to conceder what I was getting myself into.

"What are you doing?" She hissed. The accusation on her lips.

"I thought this is what you wanted?"

"Do you have an idea what you are doing? You can't just leap into the deep end without knowing how far away the bottom is."

It was to late in my mind. I had made my choice, I didn't care how deep. It only option I saw was sink or swim.

"Come with us tonight on a raid. See my sweet little sister what you are signing up for first."

"I thought this is what you wanted for me?"

"It is." She paused, choosing her words wisely. "I suppose I thought you would of stayed clear of this either way." Suddenly she smirked. "Or perhaps you like Malfoy more then I realised."

Internally I groaned. Stupidly I kept digging that hole deeper and deeper. I was beginning to think I might never get out.

A few hours later, we stood together in a quite town on the other side of England. I remember the dread sinking through my sink. The cool breeze freezing my very core. I shivered moving closer to Regulus. Silently he handed me his coat. as I put it on I couldn't help but notice how Malfoy reacted to Regulus's action. I couldn't hide the smile on my lips not even when I looked at Regulus who was smirking at Lucius. Malfoy was jealous of Regulus. I bite back my laughter. Did he not realise we were related? Regulus and I were like brother and sister surly he knew that.

"Are you sure about this?" Lucius frowned looking from sister to sister.

"Just hand us the mask Malfoy." Bellatrix snarled. He paused too long and she snatched them from his hands. She passed one to myself the one to Regulus. I looked to my cousin, a small frowned imbedded across his forehead. I reached across and squeezed his fingers in mine before putting on my own mask. He followed suit, covering his own handsome features.

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"What happen that night Mr Potter, you must understand was the way of the times. I could lie and say we didn't know any better but I am not going to. What we did, or rather what we failed to do haunts me to this day." Narcissa took a shaky breath before continuing.

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His eyes were the only thing that defined him apart from the others. It was the only way I could know who was who. My sister's heavy lidded eyes stood before me. I could feel the glee pouring off her aura. "Come. We have a real party to go too." I shuddered at the tone she used for real. I was happy in the world of fake smiles and bitter lies, those parties, as dull as they could be were what I liked. This however was going to be something else. I almost yelped as a hand slide around the small of my back. I looked across into deep blue eyes. There was warmth there, protection and suddenly I didn't feel quite so scared. Foolish of course, fear is exactly what I need to feel, not the dizzy, giddiness. I searched for Regulus's deep gray eyes and found them on my other side. I nodded to him with a slight bit of confidence I had found in those blue eyes. He nodded stiffly back, his own gray eyes a blank mask of indifference. I felt my faith waver as he marched on ahead to stand besides Bellatrix and the Lestrange brothers. We headed into the heart of the town to a pre-destined house. One of the brother cursed the door clean off, sending it shattering to the ground. They laughed, one tossing handfuls of wood chunks at the other. I froze, I couldn't do this, I didn't want to go in there, I didn't want to know what happened in that house. Sudden flash-backs of a bloody Bellatrix arriving home in all different states filled my mind. I took a step back slamming into a body standing behind me.

"Pull yourself together." Lucius whispered gentle in my ear. I shuddered. The softness of his tone filled my head with doubt. If he had hissed it, left anger in his words, if he had forced me forward, it would have been easier. I could of hated him, I could of blamed him. I looked ahead to were Regulus stood by the door, waiting.

I couldn't let him do this on his own. I wouldn't.

I followed Bellatrix and Regulus into the house. The brothers hadn't bothered to wait, their lust was to strong. My breathing became erratic as we drew closer to the screams. We entered what appeared to of been a sitting room, before the owner were flung upside down. Bellatrix laughed in delight hugging one of the masked men firing spells at the family of four. I looked on in horror. A young girl no more then six dangled in the middle, a trail of blood run up her face. It dripped from her shirt along her neck breaking off at her face. Some blood ran off her ear spilling onto the floor while the ran down the side of her nose, along her close eyelid and dropped off her forehead. She was already dead. A hand fastened around my wrist stopping me from fleeing like I intended.

"She means for you to watch, to stay." After a moment pause his lips are against my ear once more. "I never wanted this. I never wanted you to see."

"Then I won't." I whispered back. Lucius tugged me back into a hug. I closed my eyes but I could still here the screaming.

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"I wish that night I had your bravery Mr Potter. I wished I had stopped it but all I could do was look away. " She shakily lowered her tea back onto the table. "I can't say I saw how Regulus reacted that night but when we got home I still remember how white he looked. How silent he stayed."

Harry sat in dead silence waiting for her continue.

"After that night I was determined to find us both away out. Maybe it was our fate but fate had been known to be cheated."

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Somewhere along the year without noticing it I had become attached to Malfoy. Unfortunately however it hadn't slipped passed Bellatrix. She sat on the end of my bed with a smug look on her face.

"You've been spending a lot of time with Malfoy."

"mmm." I murmured. I was unsure what path she was trying to lead me down. It had been weeks since she had made marriage comments.

"Why?"

I blinked, slowly gazing up at my sister. She was curious but the underlying Slytherin in her told me she was being more then a little nosey.

"Because I like him." I smirked but let the venom sink into my words. "He's a good man." I threw her own words, back in her face.

For a mere moment she scowled before raising a single eyebrow.

"Cissy don't even try to lie to me."

I rolled my eyes, sitting up from my slouched position on my bed.

"Fine. I have come to the stunned conclusion that life is unfair. I will not get everything I want, even if I am a Black. Malfoy means security, protection and as you already told me, money."

"wow." Bellatrix grinned ear to ear. "You do like him." She gloated seeing past my childish front.

"One word and I'll hex you into next week!"

She laughed, clapping her hands together.

"Don't worry it'll be our little secret."

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Narcissa looked at Harry shaking her head. "Bellatrix gave me living hell over that. It wasn't until the night he proposed that she stopped."

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I knew what was coming tonight. I had never been so terrified in my in tire life. I was going to one of the death eater balls with Bellatrix. The ball or the evil men were not what was on my mind. That worry only hit me later.

"Stop fidgeting, you'll crumple your dress." Bellatrix snapped.

"Leave her alone, Bella." Regulus warned.

Bellatrix sneered, not uttering a word. The look was enough.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" Bella snarled.

Regulus pulled one of his dashing smiles that could of put Sirius's to shame.

"Yes, but I always have time for my favourite cousin."

Bellatrix's eyes narrowed. "Get lost, you prat."

"Happy to oblige." Regulus responded in his oddly neutral tone. He left stalking back down the hall.

"Well?" Bellatrix gave me a pointed look. "Are you coming?"

I took a deep breath before latching onto her arm.

We aparated to the Malfoy Manor. I had never seen something so beautiful in all my years. The night seem to drag, except when I was with Lucius. I couldn't deny my feelings for him any longer, everyone else already seemed to know I loved him, so I guess it was truly no surprise when we had started seeing each other a few months back.

It was almost midnight when he pulled me into the center of the room. I stood there stunned as he dropped down onto one knee right there into front of everyone, ring in hand. I accepted, blushing. I loved him and he loved me. We may not of been together long but I knew he was the one. Despite my fear of his life style, his choice of serving the Dark Lord, I was happy just to be with him.

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"Love is blind, they say." Narcissa smiled sadly. "I just wish back then I knew that."

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I froze next to Lucius as Lord Voldemort congratulated us. His reddish brown eyes fell on me.

"Narcissa Black, the girl with idol words." His lips twisted cruelly. "The trophy wife." Chuckles rung out amongst his followers. I fought down a blush. I had been a foolish young girl, to bold. I hadn't learnt my place back then, nor had I then.

"Mr Riddle." I smiled pleasantly at his scowl.

"It's Lord to you." The hatred burned in his eyes but that wasn't enough to stop me. I was above him. I knew he was nothing more then a half-blood trying to throw his weight around. I was a Black, we were like Gods back then.

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Narcissa laughed. "It may surprise you Mr Potter, but for a time we ruled the wizarding world. I was every bit as arrogant as Sirius and Bellatrix when it came to family pride and bloodlines. Well at least before Sirius started listening to your father. I can't say Regulus was concerned with such trivial things but he still had that Black heir around him." She sighed. "If only I had kept my mouth shut."

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"Lord." I corrected coldly.

"There is another child, is there not? An heir? Sirius?" Volemort looked at Bellatrix.

"Uncle has disowned him. Nothing more then a blood traitor." Bellatrix informed him. I had never seen Bellatrix speak so. It was as if she couldn't stop, as if Voldemort had her under some sort of spell. She may as well been on her knees kissing his feet. I was horrified watching my own flesh and blood act so foolishly. " Regulus is now heir to the noble house of Black, he is a much better pure blood. Unfortunately he is much like Narcissa, a little rough around the edges." Bellatrix shook her head. "Thick as thieves those two." I froze as I noticed the glint in those unnatural eyes. I wanted to hex Bella, did she realise what her wondering tongue had just done?

"The boy I meet?"

"Yes Master."

"He has a tongue like your sister?" He questioned.

"Not quite. He is smarter." Bellatrix gloated. "My Lord, you asked me to bring him to you when he cam of age."

He looked directly at me. "I changed my mind. You will bring him to me at first light."

I felt my heart skip a beat. His eyes never left mine as it sunk in. My arrogance, my own stupidity had cost Regulus is last year of childhood.

"Yes my Lord."

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"Forgive me?" I asked Regulus later, tears flowing down my cheeks.

"I have nothing to forgive." He frowned at me.

"I am Sorry." I cried, dropping my head onto his shoulder. I had never meant to drop him further into this mess, I was trying to get him out of it. All my plans had back fired. I had been too good at what I do. I had played the part so well I had failed to notice that the Dark Lord had backed me into a corner. "This is all my fault." And it was. I had lost Regulus his final years of freedom. I had lost him his last days of childhood. Because of me the wheels had been set into motion. The tick of the clock grew louder and faster. Our time was almost up.

I looked up as I felt him tug my hand towards him. He held it up between us, the band signalising my final failure to him. His silence was deafening.

"Nice rock." He shifted my finger around in the light. The diamond sparkled and I broke down in tears all over again.

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Narcissa sighed. "Things between Regulus and I became strained. I was so angry at myself, at the Dark Lord that night. I remember those last moments as dawn broke. It breaks my heart thinking about it all now."

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"Don't go!" I begged tugging at his arm.

"And what would you have me do then? Huh! I am not a coward!" Despite Regulus raised voice I couldn't let him go.

"Please." I sobbed still clutching his arm.

"I have to go." His voice was no more then a whisper now. His expression free and pained. "Don't make this hard for me please." He closed his eyes. "He asked for me, you know what happens to people who don't come." I thought of the images I had seen in the daily prophet. This was all my fault.

"I have to go."

My hand slide away and I let him go.

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"I'll never forgive myself for letting him leave that day. I can still see him when he got back." Narcissa shuddered. Slowly she looked up, her gazing piercing as she continued on.

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He was shaking all over, his knees pulled up in front of his body, his arms wrapped around them tightly. Silently I sat down next to him. I dropped my head on his shoulder, my warmth calming him slightly but not enough, not this time. He was scared, he had made the biggest mistake of his life. The ink still burning his skin, as he silently sat, broken and defeated.

"What did you do?" I whispered. He shifted under my gaze. My eyes caught sight of his arm, my fingers shook as I painfully and slowly rolled his sleeve up.

" Oh." I whispered.

I think he was thankful, it was me that found him. With all my years and all my words of wisdom, now, there was nothing left to say.

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AN. Sorry this took forever, darn reality caught up with me and then it tied me down, lucky for you I figured out how to escape. ;) on the plus side I pretty sure this is the longest chapter I have ever written…. i would love to hear your thoughts good or bad :)


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, I am not making a dime, nor any knuts and bolts so there is no reason to send the nifflers after me is there?

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Narcissa stood and began walking through her gardens with Harry trailing a few paces behind. She stopped by the roses. Her elegant finger traced along the petal.

"Over the next year Regulus and I began splitting apart. It wasn't intentional but I was busy planning my wedding and he moved between Hogwarts and the Death-eaters responsibilities. However there was always moment in between we shared what little time we could with each other." She moved again slowly down the path, Harry close behind now. "In passing I would see him. A grimly false smile sent my way. It felt like a bitter excuse. The lie without words. Just like a broken promise."

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"It looks good on you." He laughed softly as my eyes meet his in the mirror. " You look like an angel." I frowned. His words meant nothing, a light passing that spoke none of the thunder within.

"Thank you." I pulled slightly uncomfortable the tight dress. "Now all I need is to be able to breath."

Regulus laughed flopping onto my bed.

"Save the breathing until after the wedding, when he rips the dress off you." Bellatrix leaned against the mirror with a smug look.

"Bella!" I cried horrified.

Regulus rolled onto the floor with a thud, which was quickly drowned out by his laughter.

"Virgins are so adorable." Bellatrix teased.

"You can't say that infront to Reg." I hissed.

"Honestly." Bellatrix tutted. "His a seventeen year old boy, all he thinks about is sex." I guess my face must have been priceless when the pair of them cracked up on me. I suppose I should be glad that they were enjoying themselves tormenting me over my wedding. I should have been happy that we were together as a family even if it was at my own expense. But at that moment I was a wreck, a wedding wasn't that easy to organise.

"If you two don't shut up you'll both be wearing pink." I growled.

Bellatrix abruptly stopped laughing and Regulus raised an eyebrow from his spot on the floor. I smirked. "That's what I thought."

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Narcissa looked fondle at her flowers, or perhaps it was the memory she was lost in.

"My wedding was so stressful and so much fun. Often people say of ways they would have fixed theirs, but I like mine exactly the way it was. Even the cake incident could bring me down."

Harry said it before he could think. "Cake incident?"

Narcissa smiled.

"Yes the cake incident."

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The dresses was organised, the flowers ordered, the cutlery, the house was sparkling and the invites were in the air. All that was left to do was pick the cake.

Up to this point Lucius hadn't been available to help make the big decisions. I had Regulus and Bellatrix as my second in charge. Bellatrix had organised the seating arrangements, the guest list even. Where as Regulus had surprisingly taken on the flowers and god knows what else. All I had to do was the dresses. So when it came down to time to pick the cake there was the lot of us standing there in the front entrance way by the trolls foot. Bellatrix and Regulus had insisted they come along, so Lucius had decided to bring along his best man, Severus.

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"Snape!"

Narcissa gave Harry a scornful look. "I can't understand why that would possible surprise you Harry, he is Draco's Godfather."

"Sorry." Harry looked guiltily. "Guess I just can't picture him enjoying himself at a wedding. "

"He does really seem the type does he." Narcissa mused. "Whatever, first appearances maybe Snape certainly played a rolls in everyone's story. He didn't do much, but it was enough." Narcissa smile fondly. "He gave me hope, something I thought had long since died in me."

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We argued over who was going to go with me to pick the cake but in the end we all decided to go together. I admit, it wasn't the smartest idea I had ever come up with.

"So Severus, has Master given you a new task yet?" Bellatrix saw begging for anything she could get.

Lucius elbowed Severus in an obvious attempt to make the man respond civilly.

The three of them were slightly ahead of Regulus and me.

Regulus explained to me that Severus was higher up the food chain then Bellatrix. It was strange hearing that. I thought she was pretty important but clearly not.

"If the master wished to know the full details of his plans he would have divulged them to you. It is not my place to tell our Masters secrets, you must know that."

"He trust me." Bella sounded quiet adamant. "He has given me and Lucius responsibilities."

Lucius snorted at this deciding to ditch his best friend and Bellatrix to come walk with Regulus and me.

"Responsibilities?" Regulus asked curiously.

"It's nothing." Lucius looked a tad degusted at the thought. "He is going to give you one too."

"Give me what?" Regulus looked almost scared.

Lucius shrugged. "Just junk he wants protected."

"Junk?" I eyed Lucius's handsome features. He clearly was not impressed with the task he had been give, unlike Bellatrix who was gloating.

"It's just a book I meant to guard." He rolled his eyes. "He must think I have gone soft."

"Ah." Regulus smirked. " Then why do you suppose he gave something to Bellatrix?"

"She probably begged." I almost jumped at the sound of his voice. I looked over at the greasy haired boy with a hook nose. I had thought those few years of puberty I went through were bad but this guy really got screwed over. It was strange looking at him. He was only a year older then Regulus but they seemed to far apart.

Only Lucius amusement broke me from my thought as we entered the cake store. Bellatrix and Lucius began arguing. Malfoy wanted something simple classy and sophicated, which was a plain square slab cake with our names and the date of the wedding on top. Bellatirx wanted it to be this this cake layered up to almost my own height. I looked across watching Severus slyly slide out the door. I look to see where Regulus was. He was staring at the only cake in the store at I actually thought was nice. Two layers, simple icing around the edges, our names and the date added would have been perfect but none of that mattered right then. I made sure Regulus wasn't looking as I snuck off after Severus. I followed him through a few streets until he stopped in the middle of an alleyway. I ducked, hiding in a door frame.

"Meadows." Severus greeted, the invisible air. I almost gasped as a woman appeared out of think air. I noticed the invisibility cloak in one hand and the other reached out to shake Severus Snape palm.

"Snape." She sighed almost blissfully. "The only other spy that understands me."

"I am the only other." He scorned her. "You should learn to hold your tongue Dorcas someone might hear."

The woman had shaggy blonde hair, with a fringe that almost covered her eyes. She appeared to be in her late twenties or possibly early thirties. Her clothing however spoke of money, it was just to bad she had no sense of style. "I need you to get this message to Dumbledore." Snape handed her a piece of parchment. She grinned cheekily leaning over to peak Severus on the cheek. She pulled back laughing.

"Meadows." He hissed with distain.

"I couldn't help it, your such a cute kid." He growled moving to lunge at her but she was to quick and aparated away and out of sight. I stayed hidden as Severus went back to the shop. Only following along behind when I thought it was safe.

Back in the shop nothing had changed, except maybe Regulus who was now leaning on the counter watching the fighting pair. I moved next to him, barely noticing Snape in the shadows on the other corner of the shop.

"Anyone would think it was their wedding." Regulus's eyes sparkled with amusement.

"Well, technically." I drawled.

He laughed, as Bellatrix clearly won.

I looked over at the cake she picked and cringed. She went up and ordered it without Lucius or my consent. Next to me, Regulus flicked his head towards the cake we both had seen before. I nodded. He winked at me.

"I'll handle it."

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Narcissa laughed. "I can still see the look on Bellatrix's face when they brought out the cake. She was vivid."

"I can imagine." Harry said.

"No Mr Potter I don't think you can." She giggled almost child like. "But lets not go into the details of my wedding, after all this story is about Regulus. I only brought the whole incident up because of Snape and the woman know as Dorcas Meadows."

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When I got back from my honey moon the air didn't feel right. There was an unnatural drift between Bellatrix and Regulus. Before I had left they had been close, being the Dark Lords henchmen and spending countless hours together. It wasn't until a week later when I voiced my fears to my husband did I learn the truth.

My baby cousin had taken a step up in the world. I shudder as Lucius told me how Lord Voldemort found Regulus amusing and interesting. He had moved to a higher ranking then Bellatrix. He was the Dark Lord new favourite pet and Bella was angry.

The same couldn't be said about my Reg. I lean against his writing desk watching him ranting about Bellatrix. Anyone else would think he was anger with her too. Anyone else wouldn't have noticed that he was scared.

"Bellatrix has become a sheep, a worthless follower. She is a servant, she may as well be a house-elf ,'my master' ,'my Lord'. it's pathetic" He hissed. I nodded. He looked up at me, his eyes terrified. "He thinks I am more worthy then her."

I raised an eyebrow at him. " Do you think you are?"

"No." He sighed before tugging at his black hair. I watched as he paced across the floor, muttering away to himself.

He looked over at me, questions written across his face. "He is going to tell me everything tonight." He closed his eyes whispering. "What am I going to do?"

It was the fear that stumped me. The pain in his voice that sunk right down into the bottom of my heart. Regulus was in big trouble now.

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Narcissa looked over at Harry. "He never told me what Voldemort said to him but I had never seen him look quite so ill as he came banging on my door."

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Lucius had been call out and I saw home alone in the Manor. It seemed so big and empty. I knew it was really no bigger then the House of Black but it felt bigger. The sound of knocking echoed up the corridors to where I sat reading under the dimming lights.

I walked cautiously down the hall to the front door where the person still banged loudly on the door. I stood next the locked door to frightened to open it.

"Cissy!" Regulus's cry rang through. I yanked open the door to find him standing there. He was drenched head to toe. The hair on his forehead sticking to his sink as droplets of rain continued to pound down on him.

He just stood there, in the rain, staring at me. Only when the sky crackled thunder did the silence between us cease.

"Help me."

We sat in my living room staring into the dying fire.

"What if I go see Dumbledore?" Regulus asked suddenly.

I glared across at him. " Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"There has to be a way out of this!" He jumped up from his seat and began pacing in front of the fire place, his face contorted into a grim determination.

"Not alive." I whispered to him softly. He glared across at me.

"Don't you think I already know that? I rather die a traitor then be one of his puppets. If you knew the extent.." He broke of shuddering. " I want out, no matter the cost."

"What about going to Sirius? He is blood, family."

"Blood and flesh is what holds the bones together, that doesn't make him family. You're my family now Cissy, just you."

"What about your parent?" He looked away, his eyes glued to the burning ambers.

"They haven't ever been interested in me. The only time they knew I existed is when they were using me in a fight against Sirius, the rest of the time I may as well been invisible." He said bitterly.

We sat in silence trying to think of possibilities. Then I remember the day we went to the cake shop. I remembered Snape. I was positive he was working for Dumbledore but he wouldn't be a viable source. To close to the Dark Lord himself, to easy for him to switch sides again. Second, I thought about the woman, Dorcas Meadows.

"I might know someone. It's just a matter of finding them."

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Narcissa beckoned Harry to follow her along the path.

"It wasn't until a week before Regulus eighteen birthday did we find out how to contact Meadows. It was through his school friend Arielle we found her." Narcissa moved to sit down on a garden seat. Her every step spoke of elegance and purity.

"But by that time Regulus had decided he wanted to destroy Tom Riddle from the inside out. And once a Black makes up their mind there is not stopping them."

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AN. So I figured it was about time I posted another chapter on this one, it's been a while…again. Sorry. Feedback is welcomed and appreciated_._


	10. Chapter 10

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Disclaimer: For the final time on this story I claim I don't own it. Nor do I make money from it. This is fan fiction, enough said.

Oh and I don't own the song, I don't even know who does, sorry I borrowed that too…..

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Arielle had sent the letter, all we had to do now was wait. Regulus paced up and down my hall, burning holes through my carpet. Regulus had decided to use my new place as a meeting point because he couldn't risk Bellatrix snooping around, she was already to nosey as it was.

I thought Regulus would have been calm with his old school friend around but she only seemed to bring more emotion out of him. She sat next to me watching him in his anxious state.

I looked to the blonde girl next to me. She smiled at me before going back to humming a familiar tune. I frowned trying to remember how it went. Something about pockets and fading away. I shook my head as the door flung open.

Dorcas Meadows was truly a sight. She was a person I would instantly turn my nose up at in the street despite her family being one the purest still around. Even in her oddly assembled outfit she oozed confidence. She stuck out her hand for reach of us the shake.

"Dorcas Meadows. We've meet a couple of times, but you were both snotty faced kids back then." She groaned. " God that makes me feel old."

I studied her for a moment, her face a lot different then I originally remembered. The first time I saw her I thought she would have been in her late twenties or early thirties but she was older. Her age was etched with elegant smile lines and her long fringed covered her lined forehead. She had to be closer to forty, even her wild shaggy blonde hair couldn't hid that.

"So formal." Arielle swung her feet back and forth. " Seems so unnatural on you." She looked over at Dorcas, who laughed.

"I can do formal, you know. It is completely beneath me but." She sighed dramatically, causing Arielle to laugh. " How do you do Lady Arielle? It has been quite some time since we last conversed, how have you been? What of your family?"

"Is conversed even a word?" Arielle laughed.

"It is, my dear." Dorcas shook her head smiling. " How appalling, has the education department really fallen that far? No wait, I don't want to know the obvious. Shall I continue?" With Arielle nod of approval she turn to the Black pair. " And who might the fine young gentlemen be? And who is his stunning lady friend?"

"Regulus Black."

"Narcissa…Malfoy." I was still getting use to the change. It was hard saying that. Malfoy. It wasn't as if I regretted marrying Lucius it was just the feeling of being a Black anymore. Loosing my name was like loosing part of my identity. As if I had lost a piece of me.

I almost felt detached from my family. I was no longer a Black, I was a Malfoy. It was unnerving. The hardest part about it was that my marriage was pulling Regulus further away from me.

"Ok, now that the formalities are out of the way." A smirk lingered on the woman lips. "What can I do you for?"

"Simple. I want out."

"I'll assume you mean the death eaters, shall I?" She waved off his interruption. " The only way out is death, ironic isn't it?"

Regulus's eyes narrowed. " Fuck up, is more like it."

Dorcas dropped her hands over Arielle's ears. " You can't say that in front of young ladies. You play gentleman until you tie them down then you can be as crude as you want. Don't you know anything?" Regulus laughed as Dorcas winked. I cringed. There was something so incredibly wrong about hearing the bitter despair in his forced chuckle. " But in all seriousness kid, anyone that decided to have a change of heart doesn't tend to see the next sunrise."

"I know." He paused looking thoughtful. " And that is why I am going to take as many down as I can."

" Interesting." Dorcas spun her wand in her fingers before tapping it to her lips. "Hmm. Ever thought of being a spy? You could work for me and the Order."

"Really?" It was the first time in a long while that I had seen real life behind those eyes. I shut my own eyes, unable to look at him. That light he had lost had been my fault and now he was just as trapped as before, but this time if things went sour, there would be no punishment just death. I shuddered opening my eyes.

"Truly." Dorcas's eyes twinkled.

_____________________________

"Dorcas and Regulus often meet here at the manor. As the months passed Dorcas had Regulus doing all kinds of things but mainly she wanted information. Some night he would look terrified and others he was almost smiling. I never knew what was going on but whatever it was, was big." Narcissa studied Harry's face. " It wasn't until one night I found them yelling at each other, did I realise the time for Regulus had come."

__________________________

"I will not do nothing!" Regulus was yelling, anger burned through him. I stood back silently watching them. They hadn't noticed me slipping into the room, their argument was the centre of their universe.

"Then you must run!" Dorcas seemed almost as upset as he did, perhaps more.

" I don't want to run!" He screamed back. " I am not a coward!"

I let my eyes flutter shut, choking back the sob rising to my throat. I knew exactly what he meant, I knew how much it meant. It didn't matter if it was killing him as long as he wasn't like his brother. The abandonment he felt when his brother left, ran deeper then any other trace of emotion. Regulus had been dead since he left. Broken like shattered glass. He would never walk away from his family, no matter the cost. Even if that meant his own life.

I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks as Dorcas's voiced had dropped.

" Then you will die."

My heart ached at the clarity and calmness of her tone but it was nothing to the emotions that flooded through me as I caught Regulus final words.

"I don't care."

And with that said I slipped back out the door without being noticed.

__________________________

The next time Regulus came too me, he handed me an envelope. He made me promise not to open it yet. I was crying, begging him to stay. He shook his head, not saying the word I knew he meant too.

Goodbye.

"Cissy, come on please don't cry." He was begging me silently not only for my sake but for his. He frowned suddenly before a slow smile crept across his lips, his hand landed on my stomach gentle. " Not when you should be smiling. His going to be just as beautiful as his mother and as arrogant as his father." His words only made me cry harder as I throw my arms around his neck. I didn't know how he knew, I hadn't even told Lucius yet but somehow he always knew. "Your going to be a great mother." I laughed, tears still flowing down my cheeks.

"Thank-you." I think he knew I meant it for everything. It was my acceptance, my goodbye.

It broke me as he pulled away, leave my life forever. I spent that night sitting outside with Lucius. I had watched the stars for what felt like decades but I had never seen a star fall, not until that night.

__________________________

Harry seemed to know Narcissa wasn't talking about the light in the night sky. He looked almost remorseful as he looked at her.

" What happened to Regulus killed a part of me. I could never quite look at Bellatrix the same. She was the one to confirm what I already knew. It was only when she told me about what they did to Dorcas Meadows did I truly feel the existent of the situation. Dorcas had died a heroes death. She had died trying to protect Regulus. She fought hard, no simple death eater could bring her down. Voldemort had to kill her himself." Harry noticed how close Narcissa was to tears. " She only got about three lines mention in the post. She went up against Voldemort killed dozens of death eaters but not a word of that mentioned in the paper. Just a tiny little death notice just below Regulus's." She sighed sadly.

"Regulus was killed in mere seconds after her fall, already half dead from his mission. " Narcissa wiped a tear from her eye. " He was only eighteen." Harry felt for her, he knew how hard it was loosing someone you love.

"I was distraught. Only the letter he had left me, eased my pain. I was proud to know that he had taken a piece of the Dark Lord's soul with him. At least he tried to make a difference."

"You knew? You knew all this time and yet you did nothing?" The accusation was on Harry's lips.

"Yes, I knew and still did nothing." She stared at Harry long and hard.

"After everything I had already been through I wasn't about to go off and save the world. I had lost almost my whole family, in a way I felt as if I had. But then I gained one. Draco was born the next year, I had a child to protect and I did it the best way I could. It was only two years after Regulus's death, the Dark Lord was defeated by a infant, barely a month younger then my own son. Then Bellatrix was taken to Azkban." The pain was written in her eyes. " I thought, it was all over. I never thought…" She took a shaky breath, going back to her story.

__________________________

Regulus's funeral was unbearable. I couldn't even look at his parents, my Uncle and Aunt. Nor could I stand to speak to Bellatrix, she was one of them. A death eater. A killer.

The only thing that broke my downward spiral of despair was the gentle singing. I followed the voice up the hill from where my family stood in silence around his grave. There she stood, wispy blonde hair blowing around in the air, her song faint but true. A letter still clutched in her hand.

"Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket. Never let it fade away."

I stayed and listened to her sing. Her voice wasn't beautiful, just steady and that's all I needed. We never spoke. We just stayed until the sun left the world behind.

__________________________

"He left several copies of this letter with those he trusted the most. One he sent to Sirius himself. One he passed on to Arielle in hope her talented tongue could get Sirius to read it. And the last one, he left with me."

Harry's head snapped up.

Narcissa pulled out a weathered envelope and handed it across to him. He flipped it over, opening the Black crest wax seal. His eyes glued to the hastily written letter. The final words left unsaid.

__________________________

_Dear Sirius, _

_There is nothing I can write down on paper that you would believe, this is not a confession of guilt, nor is it an apology for what you think happened. I could tell you the truth but you would never believe me, you may not be part of my life anymore, but you are still my brother. _

_I hope one day you'll know the truth for what it is. I hope that you lived long enough to realise, I, was never your enemy. _

_This letter is just to tell you I love you, and goodbye. _

_I know I am not going to see the day out, it's funny knowing this is the end, and the only one I want to see, is you. _

_I hope that you can forgive me, but I don't think you will. It was nice knowing you brother, see you on the other side. Just so you know you were always the brighter star. _

_Love Regulus _

__________________________

Harry's hand shakily folded the parchment back into the envelope. He looked over to Narcissa, her eyes watery.

"Did Sirius ever read this?"

"No." She whispered.

___________________________

As Harry walked away from Malfoy Manor he felt lost. He had been searching for something else. Someone to blame, someone to praise. He felt neither, and his mind was more twisted and torn up then before. It didn't matter which side of the fence he heard the tale from, they both ended in the same sticky way. He was no villain, nor was he a hero. He was just a kid born in the wrong time and in the wrong place. Harry wonder if Regulus really had much more of a chance at life then he did.

Circumstances, times, people, the stories were all the same. Some lived, some died. He sighed thinking of the letter.

Perhaps, some stories were not meant to be shared.

__________________________

AN. And so the story ends.

So…… what did you think??


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